Fixing Her Crown

We have all heard the saying that real queens fix each other’s crowns. Yep, it’s a great hashtag – makes a pretty good meme as well. But how many of us can really say that’s what we do day in and day out? While I would like to believe we all start out with the best intentions, we fall short, myself included. But let’s think about it, if we all looked in the mirror and truly chose to try to support, encourage and love on other women every day what an impact that could really make? Let’s just look at a few ways we can fix another woman’s crown starting now:

• Stop Sipping Tea – In other words, don’t gossip about another woman behind her back, even if all you do is listen and laugh you are still complicit. If you are in the company of others putting someone down, first try to change the subject, if that does not work perhaps you should remove yourself. Just as you would not like finding out a so-called friend was bad mouthing you behind your back, they would be just as bothered by that behavior from you.

• Set the Foundation – Make sure that another woman knows who you are and that she can count on you, I mean really count on you. If you say you will do something, you do it. If you say you will be somewhere, you will be there with bells on. Real friends are quite often the one person you have that you can talk to about everything: the guy that just dumped you, the promotion you didn’t get, the financial problems you are experiencing. When times are hard a woman wants someone she can count on, not someone who is only there when it suits them.

• Honor Code – Tell them the truth, do not lie to them and set them up to get really hurt in the long run! If she is falling for a guy and telling you all the warning signs she see’s do not lie to her and try to convince her those signs aren’t real! It’s better to be there for her and tell her the truth now than watch her get cheated on, abused or taken advantage of in the long run. The same goes for when she is wrong about something. You know how it is, they are telling us their side of an argument and instead of telling her she needs to go back and apologize we encourage her to stay on the wrong track!

• Encourage, Love & Support – There is enough room for all of us to succeed: at life, love, careers whatever it is we want to do. Don’t ever let jealousy or envy fester in your heart. Yeah, we all may feel it a time or two, but acknowledge it and let go of it. Your time will come. Encourage another woman to go after everything she deserves, support her when she stumbles and love her through it all. If she is a good friend, she will do the same for you as you try to reach your goals in life. Yes, we all like to say we don’t need anyone, we can do it on our own. But think about how much joy there is in doing it together, cheering each other in the process!

What other ways can you help fix another woman’s crown? I would love to hear your thoughts!

pretty brunette woman wearing crown

Stop with the Negativity!

 

Some conversations drain you. Let’s just be honest, some people drain you. The negative, angry with the world thing can be too much and zap all your energy out. Recently after looking forward to an event, I lost all excitement in less than an hour, I kid you not. It was a barrage of one person after another complaining about everything. Like aren’t you happy about anything in your life?? Anything?

 

The thing some of us try to avoid is simply cutting people or situations out of our lives. But sometimes, it’s just what is best for us and our wellbeing. Now obviously there are some people and situations you must deal with, but you can definitely try to limit the time required to a minimum.

 

Now be really honest with yourself, are you the negative one in your group? The person who is never happy about anything? You may be and not even realize it. Think about your recent interactions with other people and the things you contributed to the conversation. Was any of it positive and upbeat? Or looking back did it just seem like frustration and complaints about everything?

 

Even if you are the culprit, you can change that. Starting now. Start looking at the things in your life that you have gratitude about. I don’t care how small it may seem. Feeling frustrated about someone giving you attitude at work? Remember you have a job while others are trying hard to find one. Annoyed your husband left the bathroom in disarray yet again? There are widows and divorcees wishing for those moments again. You get the idea. For every negative thought, try to find a positive – even if its just the cup of coffee you are going to go have while you reset your thoughts!

 

What steps can you do today to make sure you are not the person others dread interacting with?

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YoungBoy

Ok I admit, I didn’t even know who YoungBoy was prior to all the shenanigans when the story broke about his girlfriend. If you have been missing out on your social media updates, the feeds were full of updates regarding him allegedly forcing his girlfriend to sleep in a hotel lobby while he entertained other women in his hotel room. Of course, someone took pictures of her and posted them online, but she further fueled the fire by making videos trying to say everyone was blowing it out of proportion. Later more photos surfaced of him taking her shopping to make it up to her.

Everyone is in a tizzy about this, but lets look at it realistically.

• First, she is only 17 so perhaps she just does not have the maturity yet to fully know her worth. Let’s be honest, there are grown women who have accepted some of the same treatment if not more for years.

• We are not in their relationship, perhaps they had a clear understanding from the very beginning that there would be some type of open door policy.

• In her mind, this may be all she thinks she deserves. Or worse, she may see it as a sign of someone who really loves her.

Now on some grown woman ish, lets be brutally honest. How many of us know grown women who accept being disrespected on the regular?? This is not some weird thing that only happens when a man is a celebrity. We have all been there – perhaps not to this degree – but we were probably fortunate enough to have friends, family or dang strangers ready to shake some sense into us.

In that light, perhaps instead of bashing her, we should pray for her. Hopefully someone close to her can be there for her when she really concludes she deserves better. But as women, we have got to stop bashing and start supporting and guiding the younger generation into the type of women they truly have the capability to be.

Women Doing it for Themselves (Part 3)

It’s the end of the year, that time when so many of us start to reevaluate our goals for the new year. Instead of waiting, why not start right now?! Tomorrow is not promised.

As promised, this is the final chapter in my series on women who have already jumped in the fire with both feet in an effort to achieve their dreams. Meet Rachelle Jean-Batiste, owner and operator of ‘For Goodness Cake’.

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As successful as she is now, Rachelle never really considered going into business for herself with baked goods. She was quite content selling for a national make-up company when a friend asked her to attend a cake decorating class with her at a craft store. Unbeknownst to that friend the only thing Rachelle really heard was ‘eat & shop’ 🙂

Later she posted a photo of a cake she had done only to be surprised when someone inquired about ordering one. A freind suggested going into business together and the vision was born. However that freind kept procrastinating and taking so long that Rachelle finally decided to make a go on her own. She prayed about a name and the dream began.

That initial class really only taught her the basics so she had to learn the rest on her own. Between YouTube and Internet research she taught herself everything she needed to know.

During all of this her strongest supporter has been her husband. Rachelle credits him as being the one to motivate her at every turn. As she states, he could be flat on the ground and he would still use his last breath to encourage her!

The one word she would say describes her: Confident.

Rachelle’s Empowerment Song is ‘I’m Blessed’ by Charlie Wilson. That song is especially encouraging when she hits obstacles. Her biggest obstacle to date is that she is her own worse critic! Luckily her husband is always there to reassure her!

Rachelle’s advice to other women considering making that leap is simple:

  • Don’t give up!
  • Don’t let other people talk you out of things.
  • Failure is an option. Take that failure and learn from it!
  • Always avoid negativity.

As of now Rachelle is gearing up for the holidays, you can view her work here: https://www.facebook.com/ForGoodnessCake.yummm/ and view her holiday specials on the flyer below.

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Women Doing it for Themselves! (Part 2)

It is imperative that women support and encourage other women in this thing we call life. In that realm, nothing motivates us better than watching another sister take that leap and make it! As promised, this is part two of the three part series on women leaping with both feet to go after their dreams.

This is Ty’Rasha Johnson an Amazing Stylist and Co-owner of EnviedHair LLC specializing in Luxury Hair Extensions.

Tyrasha

 

At the start of her career Ty’Rasha worked for a well known salon as she entered into the world of beauty. While that company offered amazing educational opportunities she found her creativity stifled by the restrictions and limitations of the company.

Ready to step outside of that box she decided to venture out on her own and be her own boss. That decision not only catapulted her career as a stylist but it also forged a bond with the woman that would ultimately become her partner in the launch of EnviedHair LLC.

Looking back, Ty’Rasha considers her friends and family as her strongest support team in both ventures. In addition to being one of her strongest supporters, her boyfriend also serves as her sounding board, encouraging her to bounce ideas off him for honest feedback. He balances her out and helps her maintain tunnel vision.

Education is imperative to launch a career as a stylist. Starting a company as a supplier of quality hair extensions is another ball game entirely. There was no one to hold her hand and guide her. It was simply lots of trial and error. Research, buying and testing products before she would ever dream of offering it to her clients.

When asked what one word she would say described her, Ty’Rasha knew the answer Immediately: Unique! It’s the same word she has used since she was little. Never one to fit just one mold she can mesh with all settings.

Ty’Rasha’s Empowerment Quote? ‘God will not put more on me than I can bear’

That quote provided the necessary strength when obstacles started to make her question her ability to succeed. In addition, she is a strong believer in starting each day off with worship music. It’s a consistent reminder to stay focused and motivated.

Ty’Rasha’s advice to women afraid to take the leap to go after their dreams is very clear:

  • Stop shortchanging yourself!
  • It is a breath of fresh air watching your vision manifest.
  • Live the life you should be living by walking in your truth!

Stay connected with Ty’Rasha and catch the latest deals the company has to offer at the links below:

http://instagram.com/tyrasha

http://instagram.com/enviedhairllc

See Also: Women Doing it for Themselves! (Part 1)

Women Doing it for Themselves! (Part 1)

Sometimes as women I don’t think we really know just how strong and amazing we really are. So in that realm of thinking I am launching a new series to take a look at a few women who are each amazing in their own individual and unique way, women who have taken a leap and stepped out of the box society sometimes traps us in. Each of these women have trusted in their dream enough to stop dreaming and start doing!

Meet Robyn Richardson of Richardson & Ross Beauty which specializes in makeup applications for weddings, proms and special events.

Robyn

 

Robyn recalls an interest in the world of makeup and the magic it entails as far back as her childhood after watching her mother seem to transform herself with each application.

As her interest grew she taught herself more and more through practice and online videos. That attention to detail would soon start a word of mouth awareness among her college peers contacting her for her talents. That alone gave her the inspiration to launch out into business for herself.

Robyn considers her parents as the first tier of her support team back then. As she notes they would ‘gas her up’ to believe she could achieve anything right from the beginning and even more so once they really saw her work. Now she also has her husband who not only believes in her vision but invests in the dream as needed.

After 11 years in the business she joined forces with her partner to form Richardson and Ross Beauty a year ago. As a team the company is gaining recognition for the quality of their work and customer satisfaction.

When asked what one word she would say described her, Robyn’s answer was simple: Dynamic! I couldn’t agree more.

Robyn’s advice to other women ready to pursue their dreams is pretty straight forward:

  • Stay focused on your goal.
  • Keep personal feelings out of business.
  • Sick to your beliefs.
  • Avoid negativity.

Robyn’s Empowerment Song? ‘Happy Feelings’ by Frankie Beverly and Maze

Currently the company is gearing up for holiday and prom business. Later they do plan to add training classes for skincare to their customer base. Contact them or check their services here:

http://Facebook.com/RichRossBeauty

 

See Also: Women Doing it for Themselves! (Part 2)

Not Again!

There are so many times when I virtually find it impossible to focus on the trivial things I normally find important. This is one of those times. Don’t get me wrong, on a normal basis these things do not seem trivial in the least. But today is different.

I had plans to get some writing done today, update my social media platforms and work on a new venture I have in mind. Then I picked up my phone. Another notification for yet another shooting. This time it’s a church. Suddenly nothing else matters. I feel sick. There is no way to even try to comprehend what those families are going through right now. The loss, the devastation of family and freinds you never get to see again, say I love you or just hold on to.

It’s a church! If we can’t feel safe there where can we feel safe? I don’t understand, probably never will. Right now I just want to take a moment to pray for the victims and their love ones. Because there is only one source of relief at a time like this: faith in God to guide us all.